Happy Birthday, Caroline No
The memory of her rose unbidden when I looked at the date - March 23 - and remembered it was her birthday. Fortunately I haven't seen her in more than 20 years, so she won't be hurt that she didn't hear from me.
My college sweetheart was a warm and wonderful young woman, as outgoing as I was introverted. She was my second love but a much better complement to me than my first love had been. She helped me talk through the pain of that first breakup, and then she enthusiastically filled the empty hole in my heart. My junior and senior years of college were happy times because she was wrapped up in the middle of them.
To this day I can't listen to the song "Caroline No" because I was as stupid as Brian Wilson was. I came back from summer vacation and she had cut her long, luxurious tangle of hair into (what I now recognize as) a cute bob that (I now realize) was a better fit for her bubbly personality. Like Mr. Wilson, I reacted with something akin to "How could you do this to me???" Naturally she was crushed that her sweetie would go semi-ballistic over a haircut. Naturally I was embarrassed that I reacted so stupidly but too young to say so.
We continued to have a warm, loving relationship, but it was never quite the same from that point. The night I finished my final exam of senior year, she sat me down and told me our relationship was ending simultaneously with my college career. Talk about mixed feelings! - my greatest achievement (I got da big diploma and my first full-time job) coincided with my greatest (to that point) heartbreak.
The last time I saw her, I was a Reaganite, she hated Reagan, and she introduced me to the man who would become her second husband. I read in the alumni magazine when they had their first child when she was 37 - not sure if she ever had another. I Google'd her a while later and found her father's obituary - he had died five years to the day before I did the search. I was genuinely sad - he was a nifty guy, one of my favorite fathers-in-law who never was my father-in-law.
She turned 51 Thursday, but in my mind she'll always be that vivacious, sexy coed who surprised the hell out of me by taking me into her life and bed - me, the skinny geeky kid who was not in her league. It took longer than I care to admit to forgive and forget that final heartbreak. I'm glad the memory of love is what lingers now. The best part? I can only remember what she looked like when she was grinning.
My college sweetheart was a warm and wonderful young woman, as outgoing as I was introverted. She was my second love but a much better complement to me than my first love had been. She helped me talk through the pain of that first breakup, and then she enthusiastically filled the empty hole in my heart. My junior and senior years of college were happy times because she was wrapped up in the middle of them.
To this day I can't listen to the song "Caroline No" because I was as stupid as Brian Wilson was. I came back from summer vacation and she had cut her long, luxurious tangle of hair into (what I now recognize as) a cute bob that (I now realize) was a better fit for her bubbly personality. Like Mr. Wilson, I reacted with something akin to "How could you do this to me???" Naturally she was crushed that her sweetie would go semi-ballistic over a haircut. Naturally I was embarrassed that I reacted so stupidly but too young to say so.
We continued to have a warm, loving relationship, but it was never quite the same from that point. The night I finished my final exam of senior year, she sat me down and told me our relationship was ending simultaneously with my college career. Talk about mixed feelings! - my greatest achievement (I got da big diploma and my first full-time job) coincided with my greatest (to that point) heartbreak.
The last time I saw her, I was a Reaganite, she hated Reagan, and she introduced me to the man who would become her second husband. I read in the alumni magazine when they had their first child when she was 37 - not sure if she ever had another. I Google'd her a while later and found her father's obituary - he had died five years to the day before I did the search. I was genuinely sad - he was a nifty guy, one of my favorite fathers-in-law who never was my father-in-law.
She turned 51 Thursday, but in my mind she'll always be that vivacious, sexy coed who surprised the hell out of me by taking me into her life and bed - me, the skinny geeky kid who was not in her league. It took longer than I care to admit to forgive and forget that final heartbreak. I'm glad the memory of love is what lingers now. The best part? I can only remember what she looked like when she was grinning.
posted by B.W. Richardson at
11:44 PM
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